Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: For a friend, grieving.

Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: For a friend, grieving.: By Dr. Jeffrey Lant Author’s program note. Many great musicians have written notable funeral music. The need for such music is great when...

For a friend, grieving.

By Dr. Jeffrey Lant

Author’s program note. Many great musicians have written notable funeral music. The need for such music is great when a beloved one passes… because words, no matter how apt, seem inadequate to their soothing task, now urgent; and so we look to music for the solace words cannot give. Thus I have selected Edvard Grieg’s “Funeral March for Rikard Nordraak” composed in 1866 to accompany these reflections.

It was written in honor of his friend and fellow Norwegian composer Rikard Nordraak, who died in March of that year, just 23 years old.

As a posthumous gift to his friend, Grieg wrote this piece at once, writing it as a piano piece in A minor. He so valued it that not only did he travel with it so that it could be immediately available for his concerts… but he directed it be played at his own funeral. And so it was, in 1907, in an orchestration by Grieg’s friend and colleague Johan Halvorsen.

You will find it in any search engine. It is at once sombre, intimate, and, as all such music must be, uplifting. For it is the privilege of music to inspire and guide us to a better place where we can remember uninterrupted and without rush or hurray. As I listen, I feel sure Grieg knew that place, and I want you to know it, too.

My dear friend,

We men of science and education, we men of sophistication and travels, we men of thought and reflection, we think we will be ready when the news arrives… but we are all, despite calm reflections and thoughtful preparations, caught unawares by the unfathomable realities of the death of the person we love.

The news catches you up. Whatever you are doing, no matter how important it was just a moment ago, is important no longer. You r thoughts, all your thoughts are now about the great voyage already commenced by the dear departed.

We know this death. We have seen it before and yet… and yet… this death is unlike any which has come before because it touches you so in the core of your humanity. This is your friend who has died… your friend now gone… your friend in the process of leaving you forever and everything that was his, forever. And you scream, this cannot be… yet you are a man of science and understand when humans die. But science cannot help us here… any of us.

You want to rush to any window and throw up the sash, to see the heavens clearly… to see, though you know you cannot see, the great spirit of your friend ascending… as surely it must be.

You want to run and open your front door, racing out into the courtyard, where in the brightness of autumnal night, an unimagined immensity of stars overhead, you are sure, you are sure some trace of that great ascending spirit can be seen.

Yet you see nothing but what you have always seen… and this will not do, for a great event is occurring, as your friend is leaving you forever… and going where he must go and you cannot. You feel a sense of uncontrollable urgency… that this injustice cannot be, that this friend cannot and must not be taken from you and far away, forever, gone for all eternity. There is panic in your mind and in your heart. Something is happening that sore afflicts you… and yet there is nothing, absolutely nothing, that you can do, can think, can say. This is where despair begins… and the pain is unbearable. Now you truly know loss and wonder that any human can bear it.

And yet we humans do bear it… it is the hardest thing we must do… nothing is more difficult for all this occurs to us, in front of us, around us… yet nothing we say or do matters, and this maddens us and reminds us of our immutable limitations and how we, so grand and significant in our own minds, are as nothing set against the immensities of time, space, and of God, whom now we recall and beg for understanding, relief, and serenity.

And God hears us.

And gives us the balm of grief.

And it is this grief you are feeling now and which has brought me to you, to succor and relieve you at this great moment of great loss. For no human should ever grieve alone, burdened by memory. God does not demand so much of us; He recognizes the frailty of our humanity. And gives us each other for comfort.

Thus I shall sit with you a companionable while, no words necessary between you and me. And we shall, from time to time, speak of indifferent subjects, and so break the gloom. And in this amiable silence, you will, I know, think of the one gone before… for that matter is pressing.

Then, for I know you so well, you will remind me of a tale of this friend now gone, a tale you told me once in happier days. A tale of wit and joy and laughter… for your friend departed was clever and had a touch of devilry about him. And we shall laugh together… and thus I shall advance my task, the task of helping you resurrect joyous memories… the memories that bridge despair and make bearable so much unbearable sadness. Such memories offer a lifetime of solace… and it is my task to prompt you to remember, as if you with your great heart ever needed such prompting, much less now. In this room, in the gentle silence, there is healing. There is life and there is vibrant memory. So necessary. So soothing. So peaceful that, for an instant, we forget the sad occasion which brings us together and expect the friend to knock and, smiling, come within.

But just as we must never be overwhelmed by this occasion and the burden of memory, so we must never forget and so push away the bright memories that remain… for in these memories of him are many of the best memories of you. And we must never risk these in our reaching for serenity. For such serenity, if it comes at the cost of memory, was too high bought.

So, remember….

Go out now in the chill autumnal night and now look up again. There, though you still cannot see, there your friend, his spirit, ascends with your love and grief, intermingled for eternity. Look now and in your mind’s eye see all rise together. You a part of him, as all who know him and remember also are, for he traverses eternity with friends, and that, too, is solace.

Grieve! Grieve! This night away… and the day that follows… and let the warm tears flow, for he well deserves this final salute.. yours so rich and freely given.

A life has ended… a dear life… a life beloved, a life which has given and accepted love… this life is complete now and truly gone. But as it ascends unto eternity it calls down to us, the living, for the continuation of our love in memory and stark remembrance.

Look up, for his great and unending spirit speaks to you now… and bids you fond farewell. Give it now… and fully… for if he leaves this part of him with you, so he takes, and forever too, a great part of you with him, and so wherever he is going, you, his friend, are going too for evermore and forever, always remembered, never forgotten, and always loved. For he was rich in that as you have always also been.

Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: Marketing and Advertising Advice.

Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: Marketing and Advertising Advice.: f you have your own small business, it’s important to decide exactly who you will be marketing your products or services to. After all, you...

Marketing and Advertising Advice.

If you have your own small business, it’s important to decide exactly who you will be marketing your products or services to. After all, you probably don’t have the time or the money to market to everyone. And even if you did, it is not recommended.
You’ll want to select what is called a “target audience.” This is an identifiable group of people you believe will be the best prospects for your business.
But for many small business owners, narrowing their focus to one primary group of people can be a challenging task. They want to help everyone – and very often their product or service CAN help a variety of people.
It also goes against human nature to narrow your focus in order to grow a business. Common sense seems to tell us if we want to grow our business big, we need to appeal to more people.
In reality the opposite is true. When we narrow our focus to a particular group of people we become an expert in solving their particular problems. We get to know them very well and we can develop additional products and services to fill their needs.
So how do you decide who to market to?
Following are 5 tips:
1) Think about the type of people who can MOST benefit from what you have to offer.
2) Think about who you would most enjoy helping, or working with.
3. Think about the type of people who will be easiest to reach, AND who will be most receptive to what you are selling. These will be people who KNOW they have THE problem you can solve and are LOOKING for a solution.
4) Know that just because you select a particular group of people to focus your marketing on, does NOT mean you can’t help others who may come to you. It only means you’re going to focus your proactive marketing efforts on the target group you select.
5) Lastly, don’t over-think it. Listen to your gut, pick a group you feel you can really help and proceed with the development of your marketing plan. Marketing is a fluid process. The important thing is to start. You can always refine your audience and your plan later as you learn more.

Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: What to do when your customer says "NO!"

Life Styles of The Rich and Famous: What to do when your customer says "NO!": by Dr. Jeffrey Lant It’s sad, but it’s going to happen to you today: a prospect is going to say no to your offer. That, however, is NOT imp...

What to do when your customer says "NO!"

by Dr. Jeffrey Lant
It’s sad, but it’s going to happen to you today: a prospect
is going to say no to your offer. That, however, is NOT
important. What is, is knowing what to do when it
happens. That’s what separates the men from the
boys; the business people who will profit from those
who won’t!

1) Prepare for the decline

People who succeed in business do not expect
every single prospect to purchase what they’re
selling immediately, effortlessly.  No way!

Instead, they anticipate that while some will
buy, many will not. Their job is to anticipate those
declines and to prepare in advance what to do
when they get them.

2) Write down every potential objection you
will hear. Then answer them.

The worst possible way to handle an objection
is spontaneously, on the fly. To render the best
reply, you must consider the best reply, crafting,
improving it as you go.

Face it: some people are going to decline
your offer. You should be prepared to respond
immediately when it happens. This means
brainstorming all possible objections… and
coming up with the best, most telling responses.
Your use of these responses must be swift and
sure. There’s no time for improvisation when your
sale hangs in the balance!

3) Ask customers why they’ve declined your
offer.

Successful business people, people who get
rich from business, are never daunted by
hearing “No!” from a customer.  They see this
response, however adamant,  as nothing but a
milestone on the way to making that sale.

Successful marketers know that any “no” means
“tell me more”, not “go away, get lost.”

4) Ask why

The first step upon hearing the customer decline
your offer… is to ask why.

Treat “why” as an essential tool in making the sale.
The minute your prospect starts telling you why…
you are on your way to a certain sale because the
very act of answering this question means the prospect
is willing to work with  you to reverse the very answer
they’ve just given you! Thus asking “why” is essential
to getting to yes.

5) Listen carefully

While your customer is explaining why she declined
your offer, LISTEN. The natural tendency is to barge
ahead, overwhelming the customer. This is a mistake.
Instead, ask the customer why she declined; then give
her the time and courtesy to listen to her response
without any interruption whatsoever.

6) Make sure the customer understands your original
offer.
By asking the customer why she has declined  your
offer, you may discover that she doesn’t really understand
what you are offering. If she doesn’t, present the offer again,
making sure the customer understands absolutely
everything you are offering and its substantial value and
utility.

7) When  your initial offer is not enough

If you have presented your offer clearly… if you feel
the customer understands it but is still not willing to
bite, it’s time to IMPROVE YOUR OFFER!

Now hear this: before you ask a single customer for
a sale, you must brainstorm every single thing you
can offer prospects to induce them to buy.

You must NEVER try to improvise an offer when
you are speaking to a customer. Instead, you should
have at your finger tips the extra goodies you can offer
a customer, goodies that will make the sale without breaking 
the bank!

“Ms. Prospect, I see you want to get our widget… and
I want you to have it. I’m going to improve my original
offer to make sure you get it! Let me show you what
you can get if you purchase today!”

 When money — or lack thereof –is the problem

Be prepared to hear from customers over and
over again that money is the problem. This may or
may not be true. Your job is to be prepared either way.

Ask your customers if they would purchase your
product if they had the money. If they say yes, then
your job becomes improving the offer until the
customer understands it would be foolish not to
buy. Improving the offer may well induce the customer
to ‘fess up and buy… or risk losing the terrific offer
you have made. Improve the offer and in a minute or
two people who have just told you they’re broke will
magically “find” the funds. With improved offers, this
happens time after time!

Note: make it clear to your prospect exactly what
this improved offer contains. Also, be sure the
customer understands that this is a limited-time
offer and that it cannot and will not be repeated.
Make sure the customers understands; this is
essential in ensuring acceptance of this offer!

9) When lack of money really is the problem

Of course, some people — particularly in our difficult
economic days — really are broke. They need a different
approach. For this situation, too, you should have
planned in advance. Can you offer

* improved payment terms
* readily available credit resources (like
those at www.paypal.com)
* details on how to secure a pre-paid credit
card, etc.

In short are you ready to be helpful when your
interested, but cash challenged, customer is
ready to act? That’s mandatory… if you want this
sale!

Turning a no into a yes is what determines your
business success!

Let me be blunt: you cannot achieve maximum
business success and the profits that go with it
unless and until  you can turn no into yes. Therefore, 
mastering the steps in this article is essential to
your maximum well being.

Thus, start today. Never let a prospect go until
you have exhausted every approach to securing
his business. Treat this as a great game, a game
constantly testing your skills and ingenuity; one
with the greatest possible benefits to both your
customer and yourself. For you, hearing the word
no only focuses and concentrates your efforts.
After all, YOU are prepared for this moment. You
know what to do and when to it. You are more
determined to make this sale than the prospect is
to decline it.  As a result, this is not just a sale
you will wish for; it is a sale you will get!

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